Cooking Together as a Family: Helping Children Overcome Picky Eating and Supporting Their Well-Being
SURABAYA — As parents become increasingly busy with work and children spend more time absorbed in their devices after school, quality family time can gradually disappear, taking some of the warmth out of home life. This modern reality can loosen the emotional connection between parents and children. Amid these growing gaps in communication, one simple activity is often overlooked: gathering around the dining table. Yet cooking and eating together can create meaningful opportunities to reconnect.
Beyond providing physical nourishment, these activities can also become spaces for psychological stimulation and healthy child development. But can something as simple as gathering around the dining table really help support a child’s emotional well-being in the years ahead?
According to psychologist Vera Itabiliana Hadiwidjojo, spending time together as a family does not necessarily mean going on holidays or travelling somewhere. Everyday activities at home can be just as meaningful, including cooking. As reported by KlikDokter and Halodoc, working together in the kitchen and around the dining table can offer a range of benefits—from developing fine motor skills and practicing basic math through measuring ingredients to strengthening family bonds.
Research also suggests that involving children in food preparation may help reduce picky eating, or the tendency to be highly selective about food. A study published in the journal Appetite found that children who participated in cooking consumed more vegetables, with the researchers reporting an increase of up to 76 percent. One possible explanation is that children may develop a stronger sense of ownership and pride in food they have helped prepare.
The Indonesian Pediatric Society (IDAI) likewise emphasizes that mealtimes are not simply about eating, but can also be opportunities for learning and interaction. When children are involved from the kitchen onward, mealtimes do not have to become a battleground of arguments or pressure. Instead, they can become enjoyable experiences that spark a child’s curiosity and encourage them to taste something they helped create themselves.
That sense of pride from the kitchen can then carry over to the dining table, where food becomes more than nourishment—it can also become part of a child’s emotional experience. Surrounded by their parents, children can experience mealtimes as a moment of connection, attention, and belonging. By contrast, consistently eating alone may leave children feeling disconnected from family life.
Interestingly, this sense of exclusion can also arise when children are given meals that are drastically different from what the rest of the family is eating. If parents enjoy an appealing dish while a child is served a separate meal that is bland or visually uninviting, the child may feel left out of the family experience. One way to address this is to use the same basic ingredients for everyone while adjusting the level of spiciness or modifying the texture for younger children who are still being introduced to complementary foods.
This shared time can become a long-term investment in children’s emotional well-being. This idea is also reflected in the National Population and Family Planning Agency (BKKBN)’s campaign, “Gerakan Kembali ke Meja Makan” (“Back to the Dining Table Movement”). BKKBN emphasizes that meaningful family interaction—including spending around 20 minutes eating together without devices—can help create a supportive environment for children. Healthy family communication can help young people develop coping skills for d
